You only get to send your kids off to their first day of school 12 times.
13 if they go to kindergarten. I guess 14 if they go to preschool.
Nadia started 7th grade today at a new school AND we moved last week! These kids had lived in the same bedroom their whole lives.
That’s a lot to ask of any hormonal pre-teen, but also we are all wired differently. This is a lot for her.
When Ali (my husband) graduated from high school he had attended 7 different schools.
Some of us are naturally more social and flexible. I love how we are all created differently. Two people can face the same situation and because of our unique wiring and life experiences, one will dread it while the other will call it exciting.
Nadia was in tears leading up to the big day. Panic took over her little brain and I could see the desperation in her eyes.
It was gut wrenching to witness and yet, I worry that my kids have it so easy. I welcome these challenges. These are opportunities to face fears, practice resilience, & gain self-confidence.
Imagine the value of having PROOF that “I can do hard things.”
It’s even “better” that we are all exhausted. The varying emotions are amplified by all the stressful events.
Nadia has not had a bed. Or a dresser.
Her room is always messy but this is a whole new category of hurricane.
We’ve made 3 trips to IKEA and still don’t have all the parts we need.
The “automatic” watering system had been turned off for a week before I noticed. Many of the beautiful plants are dead.
The internet wasn’t working.
My cold plunge still doesn’t work. 😫
I have the advantage of 39 more years of supposed maturity and I still did not hold it together. I was not sleeping either and more than once found myself staring at a pile with such complete brain fog I couldn’t even form a thought about what I was looking at, much less where it should go.
We were a hot mess.
But that’s to be expected when you move after being in a place for 19 years. I brought my babies home to that house.
What I didn’t expect were all the gifts that would be given to me during my “Hell Week”.
Let’s Prepare – the warm up
Natalie had saved a bunch of moving boxes for us 🙌 so we’d been taking loads over daily to the new the house for about a week. So I was disheartened to see how MUCH we still had to go on the day of the official move. (We were trying to do it all in one day.)
In the middle of my dismay, Adrianna and her daughter literally just showed up at my house with the back of her SUV empty. They helped me load it up and off they went to deliver it for us. 🤯
Who does that!?
That night, after one of the longest days of my life, Mitchel brought us sushi take out for dinner. It was HER birthday!
The neighbors in our new hood have brought homemade zucchini bread, vegetables from their gardens, a box of palisade peaches, an invitation to use their roll away dumpster, emergency gardening help and a hose when I realized I’d killed the gardens, help trying to figure out the sprinkler system… the list goes on.
The kids are feeding dogs and watering plants next weekend for one of the couples already.
Mitchel brought us a 5 course home cooked, delicious FEAST after a particularly rough day and we have been enjoying the leftovers all week.
I’ve received countless texts and calls from old (and new) friends checking in on us – asking how we are surviving and offering help.
We’ve been through more difficult things than a move. Good people showed up then too. I feel so blessed by these kindnesses.
I’ve shown up for myself a few times as well. I did not workout in over a week and it did not even cross my mind to feel guilty about it. 🤣 (Trust me. This is an improvement from the old me.)
I tried to play tennis and was not awesome (as one would expect) and I did not berate myself about it.
I have not been the most patient, calm, cool and collected mom or wife throughout this tornado of a week, but we survived. And I felt grace, many times.
Let’s Work – the exercise
The definition of Grace is courteous goodwill. Divine favor, mercy, or a blessing.
Nadia and I were snuggling in bed last night, after her first day at the new school. We’d not had a particularly “good” evening. We realized we still don’t have all the parts to assemble the dresser and that’s her excuse for the DISASTER in her room. “I have no where to put it all until that dresser is built!”
🤨🙄
But lying there together, both of us exhausted and maybe a little defeated, she said in a soft voice, “Thank you mom, for all you do for us… even the stuff I don’t recognize.”
Warmed my cold heart right up. 😆
It’s a busy season of transition for all of us. I hope Grace shows up for you, whether it’s given to you by you, or from those around you.
And I encourage you (and myself) to find enough to pass on to others as well.
I’m sure these new moms think “Nadia’s mom” is a disaster as I have been chiming in to the text thread asking ALLLL the questions.
“We were supposed to decorate their locker!?” 😳
“What do they wear for volleyball tryouts?”
“What time does school start?” 🤣
The school has already called me to explain that Nadia canNOT just walk on in to the building at 7:30am (because her brother wants to be THAT early on his first day of school).
A teacher called late last night to check on her after seeing “a look of overwhelm in her eyes” when her locker was giving her trouble. 🥰
She went to school today with a CHIP CLIP holding her pants up. 🤣 (She can’t find a belt that fits her and the waist of her pants fit like a hula hoop.)
Girls, I am laughing out loud as I type this. I really think my life should be a sitcom.
So that’s your assignment. Find Grace. Notice when it shows up. Practice using it, on yourself and for others.
This is a tough season for most moms. Practice courteous goodwill.
Happy Back To School Season!
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