|
Arete Warriors – spirit, mind, body strong
|
|
|
That which you fear the most, is not that which gets you.
I love this picture. Looking down at them freaking out about me getting some blood drawn I could not help but laugh.
They clearly had no idea what I had gone through to make them.
I can’t even count how many times I had to have my blood drawn during those years of trying to conceive them. If I’d have been as scared of needles as they are, they wouldn’t be here!
I don’t mean to sound tough. There are plenty of things I’m afraid of…
Grasshoppers as you may remember. Snakes. Apparently bunnies on the loose in my house as this video will prove. (And this one.)
When CrossFit first became a thing, I did NOT want to do it. The thought of someone else being the boss scared me.
“What if they ask me to work too hard? What if I’m not able to do it?”
That’s my ego limiting me right there. Luckily, I eventually got over it and LOVED CrossFit for a few years.
Nadia is not afraid of much, but there have been a few things…
Let’s Prepare – the warm up
Recently, we had an awesome dinner conversation around how easy they have it. Izak was the one to bring it up.
He’s watching all these entrepreneurs speak in a class he bought and he realizes, listening to them tell their stories, none of them had it easy. They had to overcome struggle. Many, large challenges.
He suddenly realized, his easy life may actually be a disservice to him.
Nadia was listening intently, as she often does, saying very little.
The next morning she was scheduled to go on a Glamping trip to the mountains with a friend. As I’d anticipated, she suddenly panicked when it came time to go.
She was in tears, begging, both her dad and I. Pleading not to go.
We tried to reason with her… “We keep our word. They are counting on you. It’s too late to find someone else. You’re going to have a great time….”
But also, “I see that you’re scared. I understand that.” Validation is key so she learns to trust her feelings.
BUT,
“You can choose to focus on the negative (being away from us, not getting to see your cousins, leaving your comfort zone for the unknown…), OR, you can take a risk. Do something scary. Overcome this challenge.”
Nothing was working
UNTIL…
I reminded her of our dinner conversation the night before. I reminded her how easy she has it. How advantageous it is in the long run for people to overcome their fears… to do the uncomfortable… take risks.
I wish I could have recorded her face. She was taking in every word.
Her lower lip stopped quivering… her chin lifted… her eyes narrowed in resolution.
She walked away, got her things, and parked herself on the front porch awaiting their arrival.
I’m not gonna lie. I was proud of my baby girl.
They were 40 minutes late. She kept coming in to ask what time it was and asking me to call them to see how far out they were.
I assured her they’d be there when they could be (you know how it is trying to leave for a camping trip), and back out she’d go to wait some more.
When they arrived, she brought her things to their car, chatting excitedly with her friend, and barely said goodbye to me as they drove off.
She had an amazing time. I suspect the true depth of the experience hasn’t even hit her yet. I’m guessing she will remember particular parts of her 2 nights up there for years to come.
And probably the most mundane of moments.
Maybe the wounds she came back with from falling playing hide and seek with other kid campers in the dark. Maybe how cold it was, how light it was so early, how she didn’t get any sleep…
These memories, that don’t seem like highlights, will be what she remembers because that’s how life is!
We will barely remember Disneyland, if at all. We may not remember the outfit we BEGGED our mom to buy us for school. We won’t remember all the wins that seemed like such a HUGE deal at the time.
We will likely remember more of our losses. The sting is more memorable. The struggle is what changes us.
Before every tough workout there is at least a moment of dread. “I don’t want to do this.”
And have you ever walked away from a workout you were sad you did?
Let’s Work – the exercise
What are YOU afraid of? I think every mother has legit fears. I get that.
But most of what we fear will never actually be a problem we even have to face. Research shows we spend a LOT of time worrying about things that will never happen.
What a waste.
Nadia has had a few diving and parkour challenges lately that scared her. She also overcame her fear and jumped into a lake off this “cliff” in Idaho.
This was all in the course of a month.
When’s the last time you overcame a fear you have? When is the last time you challenged yourself?
Do you even remember?
Do you even know WHAT you’re afraid of?
This is your invitation to investigate. Journaling is an excellent way to discover more about yourself.
Find out what you’re afraid of, then challenge your beliefs about this fear. Is it limiting you? Is it worth overcoming?
